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Marc Nielson

Marc Nielson Marc Nielson

MARC NIELSON was born on the 21st of July in the 1990th year of our lord. He was originally born Marcus Nathaniel Kennedy, however, a mistake at the hospital had him switched at birth with the Nielson’s. By the time the mistake had been discovered the Kennedy’s no longer wanted him because; Quote, “Gross poor people touched him.” End quote. 

Despite this setback Marc showed immense promise as a toddler. At the age of two he had composed his first concerto, by three he had mastered the linguistic subtleties of both English and Italian. He was his families pride, the dreams of their collective future rested upon his chiseled baby shoulders, and then, he fell down the stairs…. head first. 

Each step that tragically rose to greet his still softened baby skull robbed Marc of all possible futures. Doctor was gone on the first step, followed by lawyer, then entrepreneur, teacher, janitor; all gone. By the time Marc’s dumb little baby head hit the basement landing his future was sealed. A comedian, one step away from useless. So began Marc’s arduous journey through life, chronicled here in this seven part biography…wait, what do you mean 200 word limi…